On gay marriage

Okay, so. Gay marriage. Mm-hmm.

Frankly, most (if not all) of the arguments against legalizing it are complete bullshit. At least the ones I've heard, which will be reproduced below as best I can remember them. Shall I list the reasons why? Well, I don't see why not. (kudos to anyone who recognized that quote)

"Because the Bible condemns homosexuality."
Uh-huh. Hmm. Okay. I've got three words for that one.
I. DON'T. CARE.
America is not a theocracy. Supposedly, we pride ourselves on freedom of religion and beliefs. Supposedly. Ever heard of "separation of church and state"? Yeah. Yeah. Marriage is not purely religious, people. There's all sorts of legal stuff that comes with it. And gay people are entitled to it just as much as anyone else.
BESIDES, doesn't the Bible also to some extent condone slavery, as well as stoning people to death for various ridiculous offenses? It's outdated, people. You can't take it word for word.

"We would have to redefine marriage!"
Because this is just such a scary prospect. Let's see. Way back when, marriage was this: "A bond/contract/whatever between one man and however many wives he wanted". Then, it became this: "A bond between one consenting man and a woman who may or may not really consent". Then this: "A bond between one consenting white man and one marginally consenting white woman". Then: "A bond between a consenting man and woman of whatever race".
We've redefined it so many times before, and I'm pretty sure most Americans agree that those changes were for the better. So what's the problem now?

"If we allowed gay marriage, we'd have to allow such things as polygamy, bestiality, pedophilia, etc."
Um, no. Bestiality and pedophilia have no relation whatsoever to two consenting people wanting to get married. Also, a 'beast' can't sign a marriage contract, regardless.
As for polygamy; what's the big deal? If more than two people want to enter into a lasting, governmentally recognized bond, it is not our place to tell them that it's wrong! If they are okay with it, we should be too.
But how do we make sure people aren't forced into it, you might be thinking. My solution would be an age limit. Say, 18; when people are able to live on their own and under their own rules, away from the immediate influence of their family. I doubt anyone really wants to get married before then, anyway. But that's a totally different subject.

"Gay marriages are not valid because they don't produce children!"
Because we, with our overpacked orphanages, need more children! And also, if you're going to use that reasoning, then you better go stop those two old people from getting married, because they sure ain't producing any more kids! And that infertile guy; he can't marry, either!
Besides, gay parents who can get married are more likely to adopt children, thereby helping to empty those overpacked orphanages I mentioned earlier.

"Children need a male and female role model at home."
Bull. Single parents, anyone?

"Civil unions will work better. They have the same legal benefits, but without having to mess with the definition of marriage."
Separate but equal, right? Wrong. It didn't work for African-American schools during segregation. It won't work for gay marriage.

Yeah, so that's about it.

A couple of links that came to mind as I was doing this:
Jon Stewart taking Mike Huckabee apart regarding gay marriage
12 Reasons by GatorGSA